Say something about gay babies.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
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