I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
