it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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