She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
