It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
