I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize