they need to just BURY HIM!
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
We left an ass print on the piano.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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