You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
