naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
