So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
