Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
