Got a toothbrush?
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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