I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
