ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
