just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Are we still banned from the library?
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
