She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Randomize
