My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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