My first STD was from a foam party
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
It's never too late to be topless.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize