Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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