If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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