There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
