weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize
