Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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