Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize