You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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