He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
