We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Randomize
