I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
