Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize