East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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