we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
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