I'm sorry my penis didn't work
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
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