i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
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