so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Randomize
