Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
ok first of all what the fuck
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
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