i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
