so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Randomize
