Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
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