we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
