remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
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