it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
