Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize