I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
