And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
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