You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
pray to the hookup gods
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
