He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize