Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Randomize
