Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Randomize
