She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
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