I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
My liver just had a heart attack.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize
